When… the taxi is a tall new one, you’re the last person on it, and it doesn’t stop at Mr. Fish, Park Sheraton, and 5 Ways, and the music is tolerable
When… the prefects come in to the office with big hugs and stories
When… Anathi fits through the smallest gap in the window to retrieve the keys from the office
When… jhoo, now now, yebo, lazy to, diarize and busy with… all become part of you daily vocabulary
When… everyone at Mel’s church prays in a Tebow quickly and in xhosa every 10 mins
When… the “bums and tums class” turns into a “FIERCE” class and you “unleash your inner African” through dance
When… the key to the bathroom is on the hook and there is toilet paper
When… you read over 25 books in 10 months
When… there is soy milk at a coffee shop
When… after months of trying different blends, Mastertons Blend 81 coffee wakes you up every morning
When… Zim says, “Molo ntombi! Uphi omnye?” and you eventually learn that he’s saying “Good morning girl. Where’s the other one?”
When…after a long day you pick a recipe (from our beautifully decorated recipe pages), sit at the table and practice trying to eat more slowly
When… you have to find Mel at her mom’s house, ambush Zolisa for a lunch date, and laugh when Asanda runs away to Durban
When… Call Me Maybe saves a roadtrip
When… there is no wind (or even just 10 mph), the sun is out, and you can go for a run before school
When… the library prefects show up on time for short break
When… the two ladies next to you on the taxi are extra squishy and you fall asleep
When… the flat sparkles after Flo
When… the toi-tois create a black smoke over Walmer Township from burning tires and there’s no school for a week
When… the school decides last minute that the Heritage day celebration will be on the same day as the health fair
When…the teachers at school tell Dinah I’ll be a great “umakoti”
When… the wind blows in the one direction that doesn’t make the flat buzz/howl/screech
When… the guide tells you to jump in so that you can swim two feet from the edge of Victoria Falls in Devils Pool
When… La Motte Chardonnay is in the grocery store
When… The car is stuck in traffic on a hill and you realize you’ve mastered clutch control
When… Jessie Princess is at Barneys on your first Friday and last Friday nights
When… the 8th grade “regulars” come and hang every day at the library
When… Big Booty Karen stands you up for dinner
When… the student social enterprise opens and the prefects are trained and beaming that “they’ll be able to change the school”
When… Santo Antonios asks AGAIN if you’re from America
When… The braai is ready before 8pm for chicken sosaties, roosterkoeks and potatoes
When… The ‘hike’ becomes a rock-climbing cliff hanging adventure
When… the Modern/African fusion dance show at the Port Elizabeth opera house is actually a children’s recital and the kiddies dance around in lion constumes
When… the weathers been crappy so you take an impromptu road trip to the Karoo
When…the State Department sponsors an “Indaba” and we all stay in our own person castles
When… the Hobbie Beach ocean water feels perfect after a run
When… The principal announces, “I like to see you walking”
When… Xhosa sounds familiar and makes you feel at home when traveling outside the Eastern Cape
When…the sun sets in Colleen’s room every evening
When…Ntobeko guilts you into continuing our Xhosa lessons and you just can’t let him down because he’s the best
When…the elephant walks right in front of your car at Addo and you don’t hit it
When… at 6am on November 7th SABC 2 morning news announces that the race between “Ooooobama” and “Robmney” is close… then they check the twitter feed… then they call America (silence on the line)… then they ask the weatherman… yes, “we believe Ooooobama won, we’ll get back to you soon”
When… Linda’s morning welcomes to school ‘hello babeeeeee” and medical advice to eat more vegetables at night to help your stomach get better
When…the matrics read “Oh The Places You’ll Go” at dinner with Angelo’s; and then the adventure of getting them home in the floods
When… a massive bird-of-prey flies into your bedroom
When… the City Lads win the Eastern Provence finals in East London
When… Milton ’07 reunion happens in South Africa with Olivia and Trevor
When… the morning news tells you the exchange rate is even better than yesterday so you decide to go shopping
When… You change Xhosa lesson to dinner-time to avoid learning too much and to hang out with Ntobeko
When…Juneta says “good morning Bubbly”
When… the hole in the office ceiling when we were robbed is never fixed so the room is filled with the smells of the ladies cooking next door (which you pray won’t be intestines)
When… you witness the windiest Iron Man in history
When… the Grade 9 social enterprise project is FINALLY over and the Grade 8 cookbooks are FINALLY written
When… “You been workin’ hard” when your work day lasts longer than 9-2
When… Scott put up with your new driving skills in March along the Garden Route
When… you walk 10Ks to digest a ¼ loaf bunny chow in Durban
When… the internet stops working after 2 months and Dimension Data never manages to fix it in the following 8
When… you drink Roiboos tea and a rusk every afternoon
When… you walk from Zambia to Zimbabwe
When… you zipline from Zambia to Zimbabwe
When… the meal has to sit in the “wonder box” over night before cooking it
When… In less than a year you go to Stellenbosch, Franschoek, Zimbabwe, Zambia, Tsitsikamma, Knysna, Plettengberg Bay, George, Mossel Bay, Cape Town, Port Saint Johns, Coffee Bay, Cintsa, East London, Gramstown, Port Alfred, Johannesburg, Rustenburg, The Cradle of Mankind, Pretoria, Graff-Reinett, Cradock, Middleburg, Port Elizabeth…etc
When… Malva Pudding is on the menu
When… your wife, Colleen, calls to check in because we’ve been apart for more than 20 minutes
When… you have to say goodbye to your flat at The Beaches, your job at Walmer High School, and your life in Port Elizabeth, South Africa and fly home
When… now it’s time to move back to the US, find yourself a place to live and a job in the NYC. (Any brilliant ideas for employment or if you just want to hire me … feel free to let me know)
I fly back to the USA this Thursday.
Can’t wait to see everyone back home!
Cheers,
AMB